TCS Daily

Meet Jacques Six-Pack

By Fredrik Segerfeldt - January 4, 2006 12:00 AM

Why is so much wrong with the French? It's a question many people have been asking lately, and often with good reason. Free-marketeers complain about étatism and protectionism, making a WTO success in Hong Kong impossible and obstructing the modernization of the EU budget. Anglo-Saxons frown at a social model that sets suburbs on fire. American conservatives and others rage about the French position on the Iraqi war.

A few years back, one almost got the impression that French-bashing had overtaken baseball as the American national pastime. However, the sneering has rarely been accompanied by any serious attempts to truly understand, let alone explain, the French, their policies and their positions, which seem so incomprehensible to outsiders. What's up with the country?

One could of course start to try and understand France by exploring the political landscape. To the extreme left there are Troskyites and other revolutionaries. The mainstream left is not the cozy kind of Blairite social democrats we have in many other European countries, but rather hard-line socialists. (There are Blairite factions in the Parti Socialist but their ranks are thinning). The French right basically consists of socialists who like uniforms, building on the heritage of General de Gaulle, with the glory of the nation as the lowest common denominator. Liberal conservatism has never really taken root in France. Liberal, in contrast to the American usage of the term, is like a swearword with a connotation of right-wing extremism.

But a country's population gets the politicians it deserves. The political landscape is merely a reflection of the popular mood. It is the effect of the problem, not the cause.

Rather, the problem with France is Bernard. Who? Yes, Bernard. He is the father of the family with whom I spent a high-school year in the late 1980s. Bernard was at the time a proud, small business-owner without any higher education. He was a short, talkative smoker and womanizer who drank at least the equivalent of two bottles of wine a day. In short, the perfect stereotype of a Frenchman.

Every day at dinner, after two glasses of Ricard and half a bottle of wine, he would say to me: "I know I have said it before, but I say it again: I would never let an American step into my house," me being a non-American foreign exchange student. I answered politely, refraining from asking him why, since they had been so generous to let me live with them for free.

But, since I heard this phrase every day, I could not help thinking about it. What did he have against the Americans? After all, as so many other French, he watched a lot of American television, such as professional wrestling and "Starsky and Hutch". And when I heard Bernard's wife's stories from her childhood in Germany, where her father had served in the French forces that occupied south-western Germany after WWII, I thought to myself: "Bernard, you should be grateful. If it was not for the Americans, the French would be ruled by either Germans or Russians."

Despite being a slightly successful self-made man, Bernard did not know a lot. For example, he was fully convinced that the fact that the Deutsche Mark was twice as valuable as the French Franc (this was way before the euro) showed that Germany was twice as rich as France. (I did not dare ask him if he thought France was more than a hundred times richer than Italy, considering the state if the Lire at the time). Bernard said he was not a racist and that he would not vote for Le Pen, but he still did not like Arabs. In short, it was difficult to have a serious discussion with him. And accordingly, I never really got an answer to why he hates America. Until one evening at dinner when I said: "Do you know that French is only the seventh most widely spoken language in the world?"

Bernard got up from his chair, red in the face with anger, and left the room shouting: "It is not possible! It is not possible!" I did not see him anymore that day.

Bernard was convinced that France is the center of the planet and just couldn't stand hearing facts that refute that view, especially not from an insolent teen-ager from barbaric Sweden.

Bernard's hideous reactions to the simple fact that there are a lot of people in Asia and the Americas who don't speak French can be seen as an analogy for what's wrong with France. The French are repeatedly confronted with facts that disrupt the way they view the world. They then get upset, frustrated and display a defensive jealousy that turns into childish obstructionism. Globalization reinforces the unsustainability of the French socio-economic model. Therefore they oppose free trade. Enlargement of the EU weakens France's dominance of the Union. Therefore they oppose Turkey's entry. The liberation of Iraq displays the weakness of Europe and illustrates that the US is only superpower, that the Americans can do whatever they want, and that there is not one darn thing the French can do about it. Therefore they protest noisily.

The French are at odds with the world, with the events that are shaping their future. And, there are too many Bernards in France. That's what is wrong with the country.



The solution is coming
In 20 years or so the Muslims will have rectified France's 'Bernard problem'.

Many places like France
Buy a paper in the mid west USA or talk to a local they think the US is the centre of the world too. The Yanks and Frogs don't like each other because they are so alike.

And just as France maybe over run a muslims the US will be over run by mexicans.

going down the same path in many ways though France is 50 years ahead.

There are a lot of places like France, whose Politicians, Judges & Media are infested with Socialism which paves the road for Totalitarianism (AKA Communism & Naziism)!

Stalin had it correct when he said "Socialists Are Usful Idiots"!

betra*** Russia & when he was no longer useful was betra*** by the Communists.

In August 1939 Hitler's Ambassador Von Ribentrop negotited the German - U.S.S.R. Non Aggression Pact.
Moscow then instructed the French Socialists & Communists to disrupt the French Militay. This led to the ***** defeating the French Military in only 6 days. Its commonly thought that this took 6 weeks, but it took that long to resurrect Petain to represent France at its surrender to the ***** & install Vichy Collaborators. More current French Politicians were in voluntary exile at the fastest pace possible.

Since History repeats itself, France is now on the verge of falling again!

We can only hope a new Charles Martell will arise from amongst the French. America already has its defender of freedom in place, who has removed the war from off our land. But American politics too is infested by Socialist Vicchy collaborators (AKA Liberals, Progressives, Moderates {for enlightenment check out the political history of these terms in the 20th century}). Understand this Jihad's goal is too erase us! The idolized models for this Jihad are Hitler & Stalin. Remember the West is deeply into the 4th Jihad (for enlightenment check out the 1st 3 Jihads) a War for Survival of our cultue & us!
Time To Wake Up!

Angry White Frenchmen
When we were first in France, for 12 months back in the 70's, we used to here almost everyday from teh directory of our foyer (student residence) the following: "Et les Americains ont laise bruler notre navire dans le port de New York!" (I.e., "And the Americains let our ship burn in the port of New York!") The guy complained everyday that we let one of their ships, torpedoed by a German u-boat, burn. I.e. one of the French collaborationist ships. Turns out that our director was a collaborator with the Nazi's himself, that he had to change his name, and move to Paris after the war.

We've spent about three years total in France over the years and have met many wonderful, good people. The fact remains however that the French technocratic elite is tremendously resentful of American might, cultural, economic, and military. They will do whatever they can to constrain us. They hate our might, they mock our religiosity, they envy our confidence.

Check out our blog, The Dumb Ox at where we talk regularly about France, Italy, Europe, Global Warming, Iraq War, Sex, Food, and U.S. Politics.

Meet Georges Zero-Weapons of Mass Destruction found in Iraq
The problem with French :
- The French were right on Iraq (no WMD),
- France is the most admired and visited country in the World,
- French's food is the best in the world,
- The French don't want to be fat, stupid, paranoiac and racist like americans (or like Fredrik who judges a whole country on the basis of what he heard from one person),
- Without France USA would even not exist and would have been a british colony (the problem with americans : they forget that point when they speak about WWII),

P.S.: La France et les français vous enculent pe**** pédés de fachos de ricains de ****e

Americas Oldest Enemy - France
"Without France USA would even not exist and would have been a british colony (the problem with americans : they forget that point when they speak about WWII)"

The French fought the British colonists first in the French & Indian war. The French had very few troops so they allied with various Indians tribes to do their dirty work. The conduct of the French during the war was appalling even by the standards of the day to put it mildly. Later, they contributed nothing of any real military value to the Revolutionaries, promising much and delivering little and usually late. Their motivation was only to stick it to the British and driving them out of the North American continent. They figured once the British army was gone the colonies would be easier to re-invade. They came very close to attempting it, but domestic troubles disrupted their plans. The French have been the enemy of America since well before we became the Unites States and they continue to provide support for our other enemies around the world even to this day. There is a reason why the French are among the most despised people on the planet, and its NOT envy. If I were President, I would nuke France, China, Iran and Pakistan in that order and I would feel bad the last three.

Whazba: you fail to grasp the point
I did not judge a whole country on the basis of one person. I rather used the person in question as a metaphor for what I think is wrong with French political life. I agree with the beauty and the good food and wine and you are right that it is marvelous to visit the country. However, I don't think the Americans are more racist than the French, having spent years in both countries. The US would never have a Le Pen as the runner-up in presidential elections.

PS Your PS proves my point. What whazba says in French (for those of you who don't read the languge) is literally: "France and the French perform anal sex on you ****ty American homosexual fascists", or in a more free translation: "I am out of arguments so I use pathetic insults instead". ds

anna1234 : you fail to understand what you wrote
Indeed you described Bernard as "the perfect stereotype of a Frenchman".
So you "used" Bernard not as a "metaphor" but as a STEREOTYPE, because there are the only things you know about France : stereotypes.
For your information, the use of stereotypes is the basis of racism, and in France an organisation like the KKK will never exist.
I am not "out of arguments". By the way, against what am I supposed to argue? Against "The french are at odd with the world"? LOL.
Give France a break, the world is at odd with your Stupidities.

Bernard is short, smokes, drinks, is attractive to women & wishes his country was more important in the world than it is.

Jrichguard is (I presume) American & would be happy to have his country nuke much of the rest of the world & thinks they have the right to.

& the winner of this years most hated country is....

First, my fist name is.... Bernard!
Sorry to deceive you, but i drink only one (1!) glasse of whiskey (scottish) the saturday and sometimes a glasse of wine!!
For your "Bernard", this is the sort of men we call "Beauf" in France.
The "Beauf" have the intellect of a texas cow, and sometimes their horns (in France, strong symbol of conjugal misfortune!), like soccer, big dogs and are mysogin.
He drinks too much, is racist and/or xenophobe, more often poll for the right wing (like Le Pen or De Villiers), but there are also some "Beauf" at the left_wing.
More seriously, all the Frenchmen (and of course the Frenchwomen) aren't "Beauf". They are a minority (too strong, Alas!).
Saying to a frenchman "Tu es un beauf"! is an insult.
I don't know if the feeling of the German's population have change on Irak and i don't mind, like many French.
For us, we have reason to be opposite to this war : no secret weapons, no nukes. And democraties had make any progress in the Middle East. At the opposite Irak is on the verge of a civil war end the religious extremist in Iran have take advantage of the situation for crush all opposition. A good, a very good result who saw a thing we have learned in history's lesson : "It's more easy to begin a war than win a peace" (Versailles, 1919).
So, for us, the world have four three big problems today : the evolution of the climat, Ben Laden & his Happy Fellow and this Bush's blockhead.
But we have election in 2007. I don't know who will be the futur President. Actually, we have so candidats than we could send to you someone! And in spite of this abundance we have the choice between pest or cholera!!
France had always a country of revolution and riot. In fact, we are very passionate and impulsive like many mediterranean people!
So, i can tell you we like USA, but the problem is the USA we like sometimes isn't your USA!

Some last world : the first and the second war and the GI's aren't forgive in france. The english tommies no more, and of course our soldiers, partisan and civilian (two millions of dead in the WWI and the WW2"), but we can't agree on eveything with you.

Now i let you and i pray you excuse my poor english. Here in France, it's late (00.07 am) and i work tomorrow.

Au revoir!

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